Tuesday, April 04, 2006


Had another one of the regular weekends – partying one night, chilling (sleep-eat-read-sleepsomemore etc) the rest of it. As the weather was still shitty, all the outdoor activities were out of question. However, some things spiced up the weekend. Like meeting up with an old friend, spilling our life stories, drinking mojitos and partying the whole night. Or like Sunday evening with friends and good food.

I bumped into an old acquaintance in the nightclub. He’s always seemed such a nice person, all smiles and friendly. This time, however, he asked or rather commented quite nastily on me not having a “man in my life”. I don’t remember exactly what he said but it mad me like him quite a bit less than before. That incident, plus, having just finished a book, which in big part was about a woman’s inability to cope with loneliness, got me thinking about my own life……I am not alone – I have great people around me, who love me. I am not lonely – whenever that feeling creeps in, there’s always something to do about it. I am alone in only one sense – there is no significant other in my life right now. And sometimes I feel as if this is something unacceptable or that it makes me less worthy in the eyes of some people.

I know people who are lonely in relationships – together, yet lonely. I have met people who have abandoned their friends or the whole life outside of their relationship, living only for their partner. At some point, most of them start wanting their life back. However good a relationship between 2 people is….2 is just not enough…(remember the movie/book “About a boy”, when the boy says: “I used to think two was not enough. But now things are great; there are loads of people... I don't know what Will was so pissed about. I don't think couples are the future. The way I see it now, we both got back-up now. It's like that thing John Bon Jovi said: 'No man is an island.'”) Think, how true it is – we always need backup! Well, there’s families – they substitute a lot. However, it’s still wise to hold on to some friends who help you fill the void when the kids grow up or the hubbie leaves you (not to be pessimistic, but things happen, right).

Loneliness must be the worst possible punishment anybody can ever think of. Prisoners most dread to be sent into solitary cell. Robinson was happy, when Friday came to him. Tom Hanks made a friend of a friggin volleyball in “Cast away”... I think I’m drifting here a bit... I guess what I really wanna say is that you should always take care of the people around you and let them take care of you.

"Being alone isn’t the worst thing in the world," she said. "But it’s funny, isn’t it," I said, "how it’s always people who aren’t alone, who say that?" - Zoe Heller.


Karin said...

juhuslikult sattusin siia... ja lugesin, lugesin, lugesin :)
Hea oli. Aitäh.

Hernes said...

Ma tänan:) See teeb rõõmu!