Monday, January 16, 2006

Are you trendy?

Still about a generation ago, when our parents were in dating age, it was a common dating rule that the guy had to be at least a couple of years older than the girl. My father, for instance, is 6 years older than my mother. When both were the same age, they could still get away with it. God forbid if the woman was a couple or more years older, then there was talk about it. And there were phrases like... “You know that Mr. X, the one from the Y street, the one that married an “older” woman.”

If we look further back, say a few more generations – the age difference was often even bigger. Marriages (sometimes arranged) between older men and younger women were a common thing. It had a lot to do with the older man being already able to take care of the woman and the subsequent family, I think. It’s something that has been rooted in the society pretty heavily. Also, when talking of the extremes – like 15 or 20 years of age difference, it is more common to find “older man-young woman” couples and rarely vice versa. (And as N very wisely pointed out today, that is not a very good combination. Older man marries younger woman, but he turns old and dies and the wife, often with fairly young children, is left alone.)

However, circumstances seem to be changing, which they very well ought to be. Not only are there more extremes the other way round (Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher, to name one), there are also increasingly more situations where a man’s a couple of years younger than the woman and that doesn’t seem to be such an issue any more. It’s noticeable reading the magazines and also simply taking a look around. Good friend of mine has a younger boyfriend, her brother’s girlfriend is a couple of years older than he. In the recent years most of my dates have been younger than me. The youngest potential date was as much as 8 years younger than me. The aforementioned good friend’s mum has a colleague, a man of 26 years, who’s partner is 30 and he simply put it this way: “It’s a new trend, didn’t you know it? Everybody’s doin it.”

4 comments:

Vixen said...

I guess nowadays, people just don't care about age anymore. They are more worried about other stuff....how hot he is, how much money etc.

I tried dating younger men. I highly doubt I will ever do it again, they are so immature!@

N said...

I'm very trendy... but you know, being trendy runs in the family... Hernes - my mom is older than my dad.. :):):):)

Anonymous said...

minu ema on kah vanem kui mu isa. ja ma pole kunagi kuulnud sellist lugu nagu sina v2lja m6tlesid, et kuidas rahvas sositas kui naine oli vanem... Noh, ma ei tea...

lee said...

my granddad was 25 years older than my grandma .. but dating older women has, i think, a lot to do with sex .. up to a point there is a difference .. younger people just don't have the physical liberty .. but there comes a time when the difference disappears .. around 30 i think .. by then, everybody has learned pretty much all the mayor lessons .. i will, in the future, try and avoid dating older women .. there is the question of power .. who is in charge .. alongside an older woman, a man feels like a boy .. some of us are ok with that, some of us are not